Center Of Hell

Growing up my life was a constant and arduous trial

Where I was familiar with a sheaf of denial,

And, I was taught what was right and wrong

But still, I somehow couldn’t manage to stay strong

Instead I continually found myself turning out to be weak

Hence why the future only looked to be bleak,

I guess warmth and love what I was really seeking

However, as time passed by I only found it more difficult communicating or speaking

In the short run I would break the rules

And in the long run I was labelled a rebel in school

I suppose it was easy for you to judge based on my academic achievements

And consequently brand me a failure, but I choose to view it as unsuccessful attempts and room for improvement,

If time and tide waits for no man

Then why do we all have so many missed opportunities; is this also part of gods master plan,

Is this god’s way of telling us there is such a thing as destiny, as well as fate?

They say that it’s never too late;

It’s never too late to always retake an exam

And rearranging the quondam diagram

But, what does one do when inflicted with purblindness

How does one see the signs to his destination when others refuse to show kindness?

I guess if I was never born then maybe I would never be in this mess

Also, maybe I wouldn’t have all these sins on my shoulders that I haven’t confessed

Perhaps, I wouldn’t be sat in my room writing all these poems and feeling depressed

If only they all knew how much I was actually blessed

Some say that expecting your life to be heaven is the reason its hell

So, does that mean that I’ll get heaven if I expect hell?

My life is the most petrifying of nightmares

Resplendent with nothing but despair,

The only hopes I do have are these poems I’m writing

But, sometimes writing down my miseries only gives rise to furthermore Catch-22’s that are furthermore frightening,

It’s like I’m on an endless trip to hell

However, what’s more terrifying is that I’m on a journey to the centre of hell;

I’m on a journey to the centre of hell where people show hate instead of love

The only reason I’m alive is because of the Lords will from above

Every day, I find myself pondering about fire and brimstone

But I guess I can only imagine what the future holds in the end and what it’ll say on my gravestone.