Monday, 14 August 2017

INDEPENDENCE #70

Growing up they called me a Paki
But I told them I was British first and then Pakistani
And now when I look back maybe that was my mistake
Sometimes I felt like a mistake because all I ever seemed to do was mistake after mistake
When alls said and done though all I ever wanted was independence
Then again, growing up in a Pakistani family meant I had to be dependent
Back in the day i was dependent on independence
Independently wishing I was dependent
Though when alls said and done you live alone and die alone
Growing up they called me a Paki
Sometimes I felt that it was my nickname
But little did I know, that it was their taking the mick name
And I aint taking the mick mate but no Paki aint my name
They call it name calling but most of the times they had Paki on speed dial
So i guess it's no wonder why they always left a message after my beep
Yeah after my beep that's why in class I fell asleep
You call me Paki but in your dreams i creep and I'm your worst nightmare
They said that we Pakistanis have a tight fist
But back in high school i never had a fight so get the gist
Growing up they all called me Paki
But now that I look back at the moment yeah I was a Paki
And my biggest inspiration was Amir Khan
So much so I wrote a piece about him in my gcse exam
Now I don't know what I regret more
Is it my gcse's exams or is it the fact that I wrote about Amir Khan
Yeah they said we Pakistanis have a tight fist so somebody tell Anthony Joshua I'm ready for a fight
Yeah I'm ready to wrong all my rights
Fight or flight? All I ever did was take flight
Growing up they called me a Paki
And fact of the matter is that I want to kill myself
You can blame my health and my depression
You told me to chase wealth now I'm broke and in recession
Yeah Bitch this class is in session
Moreover if you about peace then I'm about peace
But if you step to me Bitch I'll step on your grave
So you can call me a terrorist but Bitch I'm a pacifist, activist call me an anarchist
Yeah Bitch you aint fucking with my flow but this is a poem
Remember the name Sagey because soon the whole world will know him
Growing up they called me a Paki.

Wednesday, 8 March 2017

DIVORCE

They say that nice people don't necessarily fall in love with nice people
Thus I guess it's true when they say that every relationship consists of the good as well as the bad
Its often said the truth is ugly while lies are the complete opposite
Fact of the matter is that I always endeavoured to tell you the truth
Though again and again you accuser me of lies
Time and again it was your suspicions that would judge my innocent actions
All in all, I only had good intentions but what good did that ever bring me
You said you never intended to marry me but still that doesn't make me want to divorce you
Because when alls said and done you're still close to my heart even though we're far from happy
This marriage is a joke? Rather, this marriage is sad
Hence the reason why it's led you to become so depressed
Anything I say merely leads to further stress and trouble
Back in the day many were open antagonists of the thought of us getting married 
Then again that didn't dismay us or prevent us from getting married
They say that the Islamic way of getting married is to go through the father of the girl for their daughters hand in marriage
However when I went to her house to speak to her father
It only led to people pointing their fingers at us and spreading lies as well as rumours
At the end of the day though we knew that we weren't in the wrong
So that didn't make us bother about what other people said
In fact it only made the idea of us getting married to becoming a reality sooner than we expected
As time passed I remain persistent and persevered
Because when alls said and done acceptance is better than having great expectations unfulfilled
Nevertheless fast forward a couple years and it still seems like this marriage isn't real
So much so that I pinch myself sometimes to make sure I'm awake and not in a dream
Its often said that a husband should stay quiet if they don't like the food they're eating
Then again sometimes I can't help but to ask my wife for a pinch of salt
She tells me to stop rubbing salt in the wounds
Though truth is I just wish to improve her ability to cook
Every time I get near I feel afraid that she might pepper spray me in my eyes
Yet at the end of the day she's done much worse to me and I aint talking about physical abuse
On the other hand I'm talking about the times she's hurt my feelings and hurt me emotionally
For instance all she and her friends ever do is back bite their husbands to each other
Though it begs the question why can't she ever see and focus on the good
Why does she always have to focus on the bad as well as the negative
And as soon as she came home I got into a huge fight and thus I asked for a divorce in anger
But according to Islamic law divorce only occurs when you ask for it three times
On top of that if it's said in anger that only makes the divorce more true
So I guess it's false when they say third time lucky
In Islam the third time makes divorce occur
The only thing left to do is to sign these legal documents
And the sad thing is that I received them in the post on international Women's day
But the thing that's even sadder is that those people who doubted us before marriage were right
Alll in all this isn't a matter of gender nor do I have an agenda in not signing the divorce papers
So i guess it's true when they say that nice people don't necessarily fall in love with nice people.

Tuesday, 7 March 2017

FALL

She said the only time I come is to watch her fall
But I guess the only person to blame for rising to the occasion is me
We play the blaming game and fact is there are no winners
Lord knows losing you isn't a life worth living
I'm dying to tell you the truth but every time I say those three words, you say I'm lying
So then I scream I hate you, and funny thing is she believes me
Lately I've had enough of believing in this relationship
You say the ship is sailing but I jumped out at the shore because I was sure
I guess you could say that I'm drowning in your love
Then again I don't need you to be my life guard
Fact of the matter is that I want to jump off a plane with you
Because it's true that your love makes me fly
On the other hand lately it's like we're crash landing
Girl will you be my parachute and help me land on my feet
One foot in the grave? I'm prepared for both feet to be in the grave as long as I'm buried next to you
I'm buried in sand up to my head, though for you it's the complete opposite
In other words you've lost your head, you've lost your cool even though you're smoking hot
We bought a house together but it's you that makes it a home
When I'm without you I feel nothing but loneliness
Back in the day you were the one that decorated and refurbished the whole house
However now that we're close to separating you're stripping off the wallpaper
When I ripped up the divorce papers, it befuddled me how it just made you laugh
And it makes me wonder whether our marriage was always a joke
Moreover I know that I could only afford taking you out for a meal once a month
But that doesn't give you the right to count the fact that you provided 3 meals a day for us
Because when alls said and done Its the thought that counts
Lately I've been counting on a calculator more than you
Some people wish for us to be divided and I think of them as our enemies
What's more is that I can't seem to add up how our relationship has become more complicated than algebra
All in all I hate the fact that I have to see my son only once a week
I go to your office but I find that you're not there
When I go to the bedroom I see you burning our wedding album
And now our wedding is just a memory that will be forgotten in the future
You rush downstairs but then I grab your hand at the top of the stairs
Then all of a sudden you take a fall down the stairs somehow
I run down to check on you, but it's too late because you're already dead
When alls said and done though that's not the end of this story
Because that small fire you started in the bedroom turns into an even bigger one
In other words it spreads throughout the whole house
I think of our baby sleeping in his crib but then the chandelier falls on my head
On top of that the fire reaches  downstairs and smothers the whole house
All in all my last thought is of our innocent child that died because of our recklessness
She said the only time I came around was to watch her fall
But now that this terrible accident has happened, our souls have risen and gone to heaven.

Friday, 11 November 2016

SUSPICION

They say that suspicion is forbidden but that doesn’t mean that people will be stopped being labelled suspects
Growing up, I was always suspected because they just wanted me to do good
But I guess that the Lord only knows if it did me any good
Growing up in the hood they all feared my hoodie 
Though little did they know that I was a goodie
And if they did maybe they wouldn’t generalise me with all the other people wearing hoodies
Back in the day it was like those closest to me were the reason I wanted to be distant
Now i’m faced with this hurtful distance but who knows if it will go the distance
They say life is short but how long will it take for us to ever understand
In the past I was the usual suspect even though things were unusual
The say that suspicion is the work of mean souls but fact is I’m far from perfect
Truth is, I can have a mean streak but most of the times I don’t mean what I say
I guess what I’m trying to say is that life has never been good
Though sometimes you have to go through bad times for the good
And that’s exactly what happens when I met this girl called hayley morrison
But I guess all good things must really come to an end
Because fact is even she started suspecting that i was doing bad
So I guess it’s no wonder why I began to embark on the wrong path
I guess it’s no wonder how I started to commit sin after sin
Then again little did I know that I was capable of committing crimes
They say it all starts off with keeping the wrong company
But what difference does it make if the police  suspect me for these ugly crimes
When my whole life has been nothing but an ugly dream
Back in the day i would find blood queasy but now it’s just art to me
Now it’s just my passion that’s why I commit these crimes of passion
Its often said that suspicion is close to guilty minds
Moreover now I’m guilty of manslaughter and on trial
Yet when alls said and done i  guess I’m no longer the suspect
I guess I’m the perpetrator of this heinous crime
What’s more is that I guess I’m destined to do the time
My family as well as my loved ones come to visit me
On the other hand they look at me at disgust instead of still supporting me
However this isn’t what makes my head spin and spin
The thing that makes my  head spin is that they still suspect me of more
For instance they blamed me for starting a riot in prison
Then again the only prison I have ever been in is that so called place I used to call home
All in all they say that suspicion is forbidden but I guess I’m a suspect for life
I guess it’s once a suspect always a suspect
So what is the point of living in this wold full of bad
The next morning I’m found hanging in my cell and they suspect me for suicide
But if I was going to kill myself why would I wait to do it in jail.

Thursday, 6 October 2016

MESSAGES

They say that it’s not the quantity of life that matters
On the other hand it’s the depth of life
In other words the meaning of life doesn’t mean anything
Rather, it’s the purpose of life that is more significant
Growing up i was always given these mixed messages by my parents
On one hand when I was an infant I would frequently want to be picked up and so I was
On the other hand now that I have grown up its like all they ever do is put me down
Moreover now that I have grown up its like I’m a complete stranger to the people I have spent my whole life with
So much so that there is no such thing as communication
Day by day i interrogate myself why in my head
But nowadays it’s like my head is empty and has no message to inform me of
When I was in school my parents didn’t like the fact that I was always messaging my friends
Hence the reason why they decided to confiscate my mobile phones
And I’m talking about years ago when there wasn’t this generation of texting
Fact of the matter is that I am not angry at not being able to message my friends
Its just that not messaging my friends has made me more of a loner
So much so that I’m now suffering from autism spectrum disorder
Now when one of my friends message me and ask if I’m alright
I always tend to kill the conversation because of miscommunication
They say that life goes on and that’s exactly the message that kept me going
What’s more is that I started to like this girl who was sending me messages with her eyes
Its often said that love is blind but what is that supposed to mean anyway?
If love is blind then it was written in Braille that she was the one
However when alls said and done love isn’t this simple
Because after a while I found that I was leaving her more messages as well as voice mail than actually talking to her
I guess the only message that this was revealing is that she didn’t love me the way that I loved her
Sometimes I just want to take my life and leave them a message by writing a suicide note
Though suicide is far from the solution to life
For the only message that would convey is that I’m a coward
And I most certainly do not want to be remembered  as a coward
My only dream in this life is that I become famous and successful
On top of that I wish to stay true and spread the truth
So that I can have real fans who message me on social media
I want to be successful so that publishers can email me and message me for better offers
They say that there’s only one message in life that matters and that is that knowledge is power
However the only message that I want to share with the world is Success is Presence
Reason being is that when alls said and done there’s nothing more important than life
Moreover it’s not the quantity of life that matters, it’s the depth
All in all its the purpose of life that is more important than the meaning of life
Hence the reason why I want the message ‘Success is Presence’ to be on my grave.

Wednesday, 29 June 2016

Center Of Hell

Growing up my life was a constant and arduous trial
Where I was familiar with a sheaf of denial,
And, I was taught what was right and wrong
But still, I somehow couldn’t manage to stay strong
Instead I continually found myself turning out to be weak
Hence why the future only looked to be bleak,
I guess warmth and love what I was really seeking
However, as time passed by I only found it more difficult communicating or speaking
In the short run I would break the rules
And in the long run I was labelled a rebel in school
I suppose it was easy for you to judge based on my academic achievements
And consequently brand me a failure, but I choose to view it as unsuccessful attempts and room for improvement,
If time and tide waits for no man
Then why do we all have so many missed opportunities; is this also part of gods master plan,
Is this god’s way of telling us there is such a thing as destiny, as well as fate?
They say that it’s never too late;
It’s never too late to always retake an exam
And rearranging the quondam diagram
But, what does one do when inflicted with purblindness
How does one see the signs to his destination when others refuse to show kindness?
I guess if I was never born then maybe I would never be in this mess
Also, maybe I wouldn’t have all these sins on my shoulders that I haven’t confessed
Perhaps, I wouldn’t be sat in my room writing all these poems and feeling depressed
If only they all knew how much I was actually blessed
Some say that expecting your life to be heaven is the reason its hell
So, does that mean that I’ll get heaven if I expect hell?
My life is the most petrifying of nightmares
Resplendent with nothing but despair,
The only hopes I do have are these poems I’m writing
But, sometimes writing down my miseries only gives rise to furthermore Catch-22’s that are furthermore frightening,
It’s like I’m on an endless trip to hell
However, what’s more terrifying is that I’m on a journey to the centre of hell;
I’m on a journey to the centre of hell where people show hate instead of love
The only reason I’m alive is because of the Lords will from above
Every day, I find myself pondering about fire and brimstone
But I guess I can only imagine what the future holds in the end and what it’ll say on my gravestone.


Liberum Palaestina

Since the last assailment in which we buried a myriad of cadaverous bodies
The repercussions of needing succour in the form of victuals have caused such dearth;
That we’re drowning in constant consternation, but our lachrymal eyes are the least of our worries
It’s the kablooey which left us homeless that has robbed us of all of our mirth,

Conversely its not the embrocation or salve that has remedied our abrasions
Rather, it is the armistice that’s given us all some much needed optimism
Moreover now that Ramadan is vicinal, so is the time of benevolence as well as exoneration
Hence let Palestine rejoice as Israel has abstained from their sadism

But only 9 days pass and Israel recommence their indiscriminate fusillade
Day by day they blast their Molotov cocktails and rockets towards Gaza
And they do more than kill innocent civilians as well as destroy our palisades
What is more is they also smother us in a charcoal smoke, while making innocuous children orphans and pallbearers

Regardless of the fact that Israel carry out their assault on top of the fact that they’re illegally occupying our land

Palestine remain stoical as Israel carries out its malignant and nefarious plans